Do you remember the sense of curiosity, wonder, and joy that getting your hands full of paint or listening to a new song and moving your body brought to you as a child? When was the last time you felt that way? I was drawn to That Art Party because, as an adult, I have decided to make space for creativity, play, and community in my life and want to help others do the same. My name is Francis (she/her), and I have been a fellow with That Art Party for the past six months. As I prepare to author a monthly blog for TAP, I’d like to introduce myself by sharing my own relationship with rest, art, and play.

Hi, I’m Francis!

Your resident UC Berkeley student, sharing her journey battling perfectionism one craft at a time!

When I was very young, play and creativity formed a big part of my life. I spent my summers in theater, dance, painting, and poetry classes. As I grew older, the world around me taught me to fear imperfection and devalue the creative projects that meant so much to me. I became hyperfocused on doing the things that were in line with a capitalist, colonial productivity culture–prioritizing constant output over rest or play, constantly comparing myself to others, and not allowing myself to be anything other than perfect. When I reached college, I was already exhausted. I was constantly anxious; I worried that I had conned my way into college, that I could never attain the level of success or enjoyment that my peers seemed to be experiencing, that I would disappoint my mom and myself by failing. I felt very disconnected from myself, my body, and my emotions; I struggled to connect with others.

Luckily, I made a friend who encouraged me to learn to crochet with her. At first, I struggled to make time for this new creative project. I was bogged down by my perfectionism and my understanding that I needed to focus my time and energy on more “productive” tasks. My friend really pushed for us both to continue learning. While I felt embarrassed and disappointed in myself for failed projects, I also felt a new wave of emotions. I felt immense joy at trying something new, I laughed with my friend over failed attempts and funky-looking projects, and I felt pride over having made something with my bare hands (and a crochet hook!); even the scarfs or plushies that once looked hideous to me suddenly held so much sentimental value. When I started new projects, I allowed myself to slow down and really connect with my body and its movements. I was making space for joy, rest, and community.

That’s what That Art Party is all about. I know life is extremely busy, and it often feels like between all the different responsibilities–work, school, partners, friends, family, kids–there’s no room for things as trivial as art and play. But art and play are not trivial; they are ways that we make room for ourselves–our joy, our pleasure, our wonder. It’s how we can bask in each other’s company–in learning something new together, failing together, allowing ourselves to not be perfect in the presence of others together, in sharing in a collective joy together. Creative endeavors have brought me back to myself–the child I used to be and her love for all things colorful and loud and daring–and closer to others. We all start somewhere.

Follow along for the next chapter of my creative journey. Hopefully, it inspires your creative practice or joining That Art Party for an event!

From Fear of Failure to Finding Joy in Imperfection & Play

The Healing Power of Beading: Mental and Emotional Wellness Across Cultures